Those of you who follow me and follow my blog (and like me), will be glad to know that I finally went to a good doctor.
As described in embarassing detail in a previous post, I avoid going to the doctor. But my astronomical blood pressure forced me to go to a good one. And I am glad I did.
First, the scary news that I wasn’t going to publish here until I knew more, but I can’t help myself – I need the perspective on this that blogging provides. The doctor wants to do some testing to rule out Cushing’s syndrome. Cushing’s syndrome is where the body produces too much cortisol and things get out of whack producing some symptoms I have and some symptoms I don’t have.
As DH pointed out, reading symptoms is like reading tea leaves, they can point to many things, and that is especially true for the symptoms that are pointing my doctor to rule out Cushing’s, specifically:
1. Centralized weight gain in the middle and upper back.
3. Anxiety (who, me? ;))
4. Bacterial infections
5. Acne/fragile skin
Those can be Cushing’s, those can be just being overweight, or those can be unrelated to each other.
I don’t want it to be Cushing’s. I don’t want to have surgery. And I really don’t want my personality and body type to be explained away by a disease, as flawed as they are. I know that is the most irrational sentence every uttered on this blog (and that is quite an accomplishment). But I want me to be me, not a punchline to a physiological malfunction. Sadness.
So I am anxious. And the more anxious I get, the more I think my anxiety might be this disease. Hello, circle. I will know more after some testing later this week. I will keep you posted, cyberworld. And I will try to keep looking on the bright side, even if my cortisol levels are trying to prevent me from that. (That was a joke, really.)